I am trying hard to find a new balance in my life. Some days are easier than others. As I've heard, some days you're the dog and some days you're the hydrant. I can definitely relate to this.
I know I'm a sensitive person and while I've been able to get better at hiding it, I still get my feelings hurt when someone I care for dismisses me out of hand so easily. It may not be apparent on the outside, but I'm usually dying on the inside. It kills me when I think someone is mad or upset with me. I sometimes wish that I could be one of those people that doesn't give a fig about the opinions of others (or their feelings) but I'm not. I care about other people deeply and will bend over backwards to make them happy, even at my peril or detriment. I can't help it, it's who I am. So when someone hurts me, it's such a hard thing for me.
Why do I let people get so close to me? Because I believe in their goodness. Stupid girl.
Right now I feel such melancholy inside my soul and I am just struggling to get over the pain.
I just keep breathing and hope that one day it doesnt feel like I have a sucking chest wound.
I'm heading out for a run tonight w/the little man, that'll make me feel better. No plans for paleo dinner as my appetite seems to have gone on vacation.
Have a safe holiday weekend.
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